Metal mouth, tinsel teeth, and brace face—just what every kid looks forward to in high school. Who wouldn't want attractive nicknames, painful teeth torture devices, and tiny rubber bands that spontaneously shoot out of your mouth and hit people in the eye (on second thought, that last one sounds kind of cool)?

As an orthodontist, you're at the helm of it all. You are "The Fixer." You swoop in like MacGyver and with your team of ninjas dressed in smiley face scrubs and wielding dainty dental instruments, and you lasso those gnarly overbites with metal bands, brackets, and wires. And don't forget about those tiny, multi-colored rubber bands that kids can mix and match to get festive with (rumor has it that black and orange are huge in October).

Nowadays, there are a ton of options to choose from if you're looking to get your teeth in order. Sure, there are the traditional metal bands that have to be tightened every few weeks, slowly forcing the teeth in place over time. There are also clear, ceramic, self-ligating, and lingual braces. Lingual braces? They're braces on the inside of the teeth, like a teeny, tiny inverted roller coaster of orthodontia (just keep your hands inside the ride...er...mouth).

Then there's Invisalign—the Rolls Royce of orthodontic treatment. With Invisalign, you don't have to suffer indignations like getting green food caught between your braces or causing the elderly to get sunspots from the reflection of refracted metal in your mouth.

Invisalign is, believe it or not, invisible. Well, sort of. Invisalign braces are actually trays of clear plastic retainers that are molded just for your teeth in order to slowly straighten them over time. Instead of wires that need to be tightened, the trays get replaced (on the reg) as your teeth shift into place. They're also mucho expensivo, which isn't so good if you're a parent struggling to pay for the things. But you're here to be an orthodontist, so yeah, Invisalign will, well, line your wallet with a few extra bills.

Speaking of money, orthodontists are loaded. The average set of traditional metal braces, depending on where you live and how fancy the office is, costs between $5,000 and $10,000. Add several thousand more for patients choosing the fancier options or Invisalign, and you're looking at a lot of income per patient.

Lucky you, because you'll need all that cash to pay off your massive student loans. If you want to be an orthodontist, you'd better like school, because you're going to be in it for a while. You're looking at nearly ten years of college, and that includes dental school and a couple of years in an orthodontic residency program.

Becoming an orthodontist is a lot like becoming a doctor—you have to be good at science and math and be willing to put in a lot of hard work. Entrance to top schools and programs is extremely competitive and you'll have to be on top of your game. Nobody's going to hand you all that dough, and a year or two of their prime teenage years, for a hack job that looks like some snarled railroad tracks.

In fact, in order to become licensed to align, you'll need to schlep six patients in front of a panel of judges who will determine if you are the next American Idol...er...American orthodontist, or if you have to settle with just being a regular ol' dentist.

Orthodontists are the elite, the few, the proud. They're like the Marines, but for your mouth. They don't have to bother with anything but straightening and fixing teeth. Gingivitis is beneath them. Cavities? Cavities are a pox on their previously pristine canvas. Dentists are repairmen— they clean, pull, fill, and file. Orthodontists? Orthodontists are artists.

And they make some serious coin. Like, house-with-a-swimming-pool/killer-sports-car/pair-of-Red-October-Air-Yeezy's coin.

But it's not all dollar signs all the time. Orthodontists can have their own practices, so having to deal with the overhead of maintaining an office and a staff can cut into their bottom line.

However, most orthies (can we call them that?) work with a dental practice as "a very special guest star." If you work with a successful practice, chances are you only work a couple of days a week in that office, or split your time between two offices. Regardless, you're in a plum situation, as you have a built-in clientele without having to lift a finger, no overhead costs, regular hours, and plenty of vacation time. After all, you need some time off to spend your money, don't you?

Your clientele will mostly consist of teens and pre-teens. You'll have some adults too, and many of them are probably recently divorced and back on the market. But you'll take 'em. After all, straight teeth will make them look younger and more desirable, right?

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